Absolutely nothing good has ever come from my experience with dating apps. Just mess and a waste of time. That goes for Tinder, Bumble, Soul Swipe, Happn and whatever else I decided to expend my energy on. I learned the hard way, that trying one, means I’ve tried them all.
Although I hate them, I’ve got to admit that dating apps can be pretty entertaining, albeit predictable. Even if you’ve only had your profile for 10 minutes I’m sure you’ve run into one of these people. And if you haven’t come across one, consider you’re that person and consider evaluating your approach.
1. Mr. Screenshot
He’s Mr.Screenshot because you sent his bizarre conversation to ALL your girls for a good laugh. You and your girls roasted him for 10 minutes before you swiftly hit block, delete, and unmatch all at once.
2. The Fantasy Guy
You’ve planned out your entire life together- the kids, the pool in the backyard, the way you’d set up all of your #MCM posts on Instagram. You’ve already decided he’s perfect. Too bad he never swiped right.
3. The Guy You Know
You either immediately swipe left and throw your phone with a shriek at the thought of seeing him and knowing he probably saw you OR your eyes light up because you’ve been waiting for this opportunity. Either way, your anxiety has reached peak levels.
His intro is a series of Haikus describing your beauty, poise and personality and how you are the closest to perfection he’s ever witnessed. All of this, he gleaned from 4 pictures and the emojis you used in your description 🙄.
Got any #TinderChronicles? Did I miss any of your favorites? Add them below!